If you’ll pardon the cliché…it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas around here! I have not been feeling the Christmas spirit or whatever you want to call it at all this year. I have felt no great desire to decorate or bake or listen to Christmas music. And yet, with a 4 year old who is growing very excited about Christmas, well, I have had no choice but to fake it! (I cannot believe I just revealed that secret!)

We’ve put out our decorations around the house and we have put lights up outside. Mark and the boys picked out and bought our Christmas tree on Sunday. It is a beautiful tree. They did a fabulous job! On Monday, I put the lights on the tree and Andrew put the ornaments on the tree. (Jay had no interest in putting his or any ornaments on the tree.) It is the most adorable clumping of ornaments I have ever seen. All of his and Jay’s ornaments are hanging on the lowest branches. There is a specific cluster that faces the fireplace. Andrew remarked that he put those specific ornaments there so that Santa will see them as soon as he comes down our chimney! How cute is that?

Yesterday, we baked some cookies. We made Spritz (which were always my favorite growing up) and chocolate chip cookies. Now, I’d be lying if I said the boys were a huge help. But, they were very cute in their excitement about making cookies for Santa. Well, Andrew is looking forward to leaving some out for Santa. Jay just wants to eat them now! Forget what’s-his-face.

We made cinnamon ornaments last week. And we have been listening to Christmas music, namely John Denver and the Muppets and the albums my brother Mike made in 2000 and 2001.


All of this combined has made our house look, smell and feel Christmas-y. Yet, I still don’t feel it. It all seems kind of like a giant to-do list of things I must do to make sure this Christmas is special for Andrew & Jay. And I guess that’s what it means to be Mommy. Your job is to make Christmas special for your children. And if I can only do that half as well as my Mom did, well then I’ll be glad.

As I do each of these tasks on my Christmas to-do list: I can’t help but reminisce about the Christmases of my childhood. My mother always made our house look so nice. She would pick out special craft ornaments for us to do each year and it is fun to look back at those now remembering sitting at the kitchen table with my brothers designing them. I have hung eucalyptus on my front door because my mother always had a eucalyptus wreath on our front door. Every time I open my storm door and smell it, I am reminded of my mother. Baking cookies, reminded me of the cookie tins that were always filled with our favorite cookies. I realize now that my mother must have made several trips to the grocery store for more eggs, sugar and butter to make sure when we got home from school that there would be cookies in the tins. I don’t know when she made them…I just know they were always there. Thanks, Mom! Thanks for these warm memories. I hope Andrew & Jay will be able to think back on their childhood Christmases with similar affection.

I will say there is one thing that I have really been enjoying this Christmas season. And that is Andrew’s ability to patiently open one door each day on the Advent calendar. My parents gave us a beautiful Advent calendar that they picked up on their recent trip to Germany. Andrew has been very good about only opening the specific door for today and no others. He is eager each morning and asks Mark or me “what number is today?” I’ve been impressed with his ability to find the numbers on his own and open the doors himself. He seems to thoroughly enjoy finding out what picture is waiting behind the door. I cannot believe the self-control he has shown with this. It makes me happy. Like everything else, Jay is oblivious to the calendar. He likes to look at the picture if Andrew shows it to him…but, I don’t think the calendar is even registering on his radar screen.

Along with his enjoyment of the advent calendar, I’ve enjoyed watching how Andrew can appreciate the special prayers we say each night at dinnertime when I light the candles in our advent wreath. Andrew closes his eyes and folds his hands in front of his face. It makes me feel very warm and content inside. He and Jay have been offering grace before our meals for a couple months now. Usually, they say “Thank you for this family. Amen.” Sometimes, they will add a thank you for an activity or toy. But, the other night, Andrew said “Thank you for my family and thank you for God. Amen.” Now, I realize these are just words to him…but, I found I was bowled over by it. After all isn’t that the message of Advent and Christmas? I love it.

Merry Christmas!

Nature vs. Nurture

Given my latest posts, you might not find it hard to believe that I've been having a nature vs. nurture argument playing in my head. Are the behaviors my sons are presenting a result of their innate nature or are they a result of the environment I create for them in our home each day?

Hmmm....well, here is an exchange I just had with Jay.

Scene: Me in the kitchen, Jay entering

Me: Hey, you!

Jay: I'm not you, I'm me!

As they say "from the mouths of babes"...

Keep an eye on the gauge...

I've often thought of my patience level as being similar to the gas tank in the car. You know that feeling you get when you get in the car and see you have a full tank. Well, I feel just as happy when I know I have a full tank of patience.

Now picture this, you're in your car and staring at the fuel gauge as the needle moves closer and closer to the E. You're wondering how much further could you go before getting gas. Knowing that you never actually want to find out how far by running out of gas. Why put yourself in that position where you've broken down on the side of the road because you thought you could make it .25 miles further.

Well, this morning I felt like I was watching my patience gauge with the same careful eye. My patience gauge has been nearing E all week but, I decided to see how much is left in the tank before refilling. I decided to let Andrew & Jay help me bake a pumpkin pie for tomorrow's feast.

Baking with your children is supposed to be so special. Yet, my kitchen is never quite the scene of a cute Pillsbury holiday commercial.

I'm happy to say my tank has not run completely dry. This gives me a good chance to make it to the next refilling station, a Thanksgiving Feast with my family!

(All of this is in jest. I had fun baking the pie with the boys and they are so proud of it. They can't wait to tell MomMom and PopPop that they made it. And in the interest of full disclosure, I actually made it to a patience refilling station last night thanks to my wonderful husband. I had a girls night out with two of my friends. So my tank was actually pretty near full this morning.)

Love is a Battlefield...

So it feels like I haven't' been posting here very often lately. I gave it some thought and I realized why that is the case. I seem to be caught in a bit of an endless loop of battles with Andrew & Jay. These little people with whom I share my home are under the impression that I want their feedback on every decision I make throughout the day. And I realized I don't like to post about the negative. I prefer to post pictures of how cute they are and how special they are to me. But, that's when I realized I don't post anything because there is not a lot in that pot right now.

Jay is fighting like the dickens to not nap anymore. So long as he's still in his crib, however, I think I will win this battle.

As for my battles with Andrew. Well, he is a fiesty foe. It seems we go toe to toe on every topic under the sun. And that we do so the entire time that we are in fact under the sun. From the minute we get up in the morning, we battle about breakfast, going potty, what we'll do today. And it just continues all day with little flare ups here and there until we are finally arguing about what I made for dinner, the need for a bath and the fact that it is bedtime.

I think this current cycle of behavior is normal. I'm not about to run out and read a bunch of self-help parenting books about 4 year-olds. Because really why would I spend any of my precious free time reading about what I'm living through. I really do think he is just testing limits and trying to find the boundaries for what is acceptable and what he can "get away with". And I realize that I must stay firm with our rules so that he can learn the boundaries and become a pleasant member of this household (community, society, blah blah blah). But, it is just so emotionally and physically draining to be this broken record.

Which brings me to the other battle...which I think may rage on through his teen years. He does not listen. I don't mean he disobeys. I mean he does not actively listen. And I got a glimpse of my future 16 year old. When I asked him to reapeat what I had just said. He said I can't. When I asked him why he wasn't listening. He said I didn't want to. At least he's still so very honest!

And since Jay is always striving to be just like Andrew, he is adopting a lot of the same body language and phrases that Andrew uses when he's upset. So, it feels like a I am battling Andrew and then a little Andrew at the same time!

On some of our harder days, I can't help but imagine what life might be like when they are older and don't need me as much as they currently do. And we won't have these specific battles. (I'm not so naive to think we won't still have arguments later.) Then, as a sign from the universe, from God, or whatever you choose to insert here, I will have a stranger tell me to enjoy this time because they grow up so fast.

So, I'm doing my best to enjoy this time. I'm doing my best to take it one day at a time. I'm doing my best to not look forward, not look back but just be in the present. Frankly put, I'm doing my best.

Daddy B-day

He's known by many descriptors ~ Son, Brother, Friend, Co-worker, Colleague, Manager. But around here he goes by Daddy:


or Husband:


Happy Birthday, Mark! We love you!!!

XOXO
Reen, Andrew & Jay

Having a Super Halloween!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

My little superheroes had a fantastic Halloween. Andrew was very sweet to give Jay lessons in how to "trick or treat". We did a "practice run" on Gifford Court hitting 4 houses before joining our friends. We were with a group of 8 other kids and their parents (all 2 year olds and 4 year olds!) Both boys did a great job going up to doors by themselves. A good time was had by all.


Andrew and I participated in our neighborhood Halloween parade during the afternoon.


Ready to fly...


Flying door to door for treats...

Happy 4th Birthday, Andrew!

Happy 4th Birthday, Andrew!

You are my wonderful little explorer. I think one of the words you've uttered the most over this past year was the word "why". You are not willing to accept things on face value alone. Always asking why we are doing what we are doing, why things are the way they are, why do things work a certain way.

It's been fun to watch how much your knowledge of your world is expanding too. You have such a strong memory. You retain the answers you get to "why" and apply those answers to problems you are trying to figure out. I love the conversations we can have now that you can appreciate more in depth answers. Sure there are times when I get tired of "why, why, but why". But, I truly enjoy bearing witness to your little brain at work.

You continue to be the most adorable big brother ever. I don't think you realize how much Jay watches you and looks up to you. I think you realize he looks up to you and tries to mimic you because Daddy and I will point it out to you. But, if you only realized he watches you nearly all the time and tries to completely mimic your behavior. He wants to be able to keep up with you because you are his number one friend and playmate. I love those times when I do see you basking in his attention. There is a connection between you two that is just pure love.

You are such a great helper. You still love to help Daddy and me bake and cook in the kitchen. Oh, how you love to "make salads". Which is basically, chopping any vegetables we have in the fridge. You will help bring the groceries in from the car, help unload the dishwasher, help rake leaves and clean up the yard. You are very industrious.

It's also very sweet to watch you teaching Jay how to do things and helping him. It shows how much you've matured this year. It's nice that I can rely on you to help him. But, you do love to point out to Jay that you are older and therefore, stronger and taller. This naturally allows you to do things that Jay cannot. It's funny that you relish being older than Jay, as if you have been around the block so much longer than he and are so much wiser in the ways of the world. You like to remind him that he's just a baby but, if he keeps watching you and following in your footsteps, he's going to be a big boy in no time.

Which reminds me of one other development from the past year. You often correct me (or anyone) when I call you my sweet baby boy or even my little boy. You proudly and confidently say "I am a big boy not a baby.". Well, I suppose that is true. In so many ways, you are no longer a baby. You are getting too big and long for me to hold easily in my arms, you make clever jokes and understand nuanced riddles, and in general are growing up so fast. But, you must understand (and maybe someday you will), you will always be my baby.

I love you, Andrew!

Happy Birthday.

Love,
Mommy

The End of Summer

I've heard a number of people say they mind it when Summer ends. Now, I'm someone who loves Autumn so, I naturally welcome the end of Summer and the beginning of cooler temperatures, apples, pumpkins, fall festivals, etc. But, what I do suggest to those who really mind Summer ending...spend 2 weeks on Martha's Vineyard in September after Labor Day. It's a great way to bring your Summer to a close. It worked for us anyway:

Happy 2nd Birthday, Jay!

Happy Second Birthday to our Sweet Jaybird! You are such a sweet little boy and we continue to ooh and aah over you even though you are a fiercely independent spirit.

You have always been an independent spirit, not snuggling much or hugging for too long. But, this past year, you've become very interested in books. You will now allow us to hold you and read several books each night at bedtime. Daddy and I have embraced this new change literally. We love to snuggle you.

Even though you may have become more cuddly, your independent spirit is still a very dominant trait. This past year you developed a very strong "I can do it myself" attitude. You are very insistent that you do not need help (coming down the stairs, climbing up on the couch, opening a door) even if you do in fact need help. It is so cute to hear you say, "I do it."

I think a lot of you wanting to do things on your own stems from watching your big brother Andrew doing things on his own. This past year we have watched you try to emulate your big brother Andrew not just watching him. You like to follow Andrew's lead and will often repeat what he says. Especially, if what he says gets a laugh out of Mommy or Daddy. For example, you tell the knock-knock joke Andrew made up with such passion. The punchline is "uh, oh, the door is locked." and I'm not sure you even get the joke but, you tell it so well.

I love how you have become such a part of our inside family games and jokes too. Pretending to be asleep, or saying "wake up Daddy (or Mommy or Brother)" when one of us pretends to be asleep, stalking around the house playing monsters, playing hide and go seek. How you love to play hide and go seek with Mommy and Andrew. There was a point when you could play in these games and not just watch and we could all see how proud you were to be a part of the action.

You’ve made great strides in communication and general awareness of your surroundings. I loved when you would say “Come with me” or “I show you” when you wanted to ask for something. Daddy and I always marvel at the stages when communication can kick in and we can interact with our children. You spoke your first words this past year and now you are talking in complete sentences. Sure your pronouns and tenses are adorably mixed up but, you are talking in full sentences!

You are so curious about what other people are doing. You will often ask “what’s he doing?” when we are out and about. Wanting to know what’s going on around you. I’m not sure there is anyone you are more interested in than Andrew. Sure you get very excited when you see Daddy at the end of the work day or Mommy when we’ve been apart but, often your first words in the morning these days are “where’s brother” or “go find brother”. (Which by the way, is the adorable way you refer to Andrew, always calling him Brother.)

As part of your transitions from passive observer to active participant, we have watched you imitate Andrew in so many physical ways. If you see Andrew do something at the playground, you do it too, and sometimes you can do more than him. You are absolutely fearless at the playground. I often think you do not realize that you are not the same age as Andrew. You seem to think “if he can do it, I can do it.” And in most cases, that has been true. We marvel at your physical capabilities. Kicking a soccer ball, climbing (always climbing!), playing in the shallow end of the pool. It’s hard to believe that you only just took your first steps less 11 months ago. You walk and hop and are really working hard on being able to run fast. You will practice at home by standing with your back to the front door and running into the kitchen to the sliding door.

You also have caught on to Andrew’s creativity. If Andrew pretends to be a monster and roars, you do the same. If Andrew says Mommy watch this, you say and do the same. You are great at playing make-believe. How could you not when you have such a strong teacher in Andrew. I love when you pretend to pick something up that is “heavy”. Grunting, huffing and puffing while saying “Heavy!”

I think this year can be characterized by monkey see, monkey do. And yet, you are clearly not a clone of Andrew. You are your own unique person and personality in so many ways, Jay. And I love spending my days with you. You are becoming such a special little boy, clearly no longer my baby.

I love you Jay, more than words could ever say.

Happy Birthday!

Love,
Mommy

Winding Down

Yesterday, we took our final trip to the pool to close out the summer season. It was one of the best days we had all summer. Daddy met us for dinner and a swim and we stayed until closing at 8pm! We just couldn't seem to leave. We will be sad to see the pool close for the season. We've had such fun spending our late afternoons and weekends there with our good friends. Jay and Andrew have both gotten more brave in the water too. Andrew is now jumping in and climbing out unassisted. He can also be pretty much on his own in the shallow end up to 3ft. And Jay in wanting to always be like Andrew started hanging out in the "big pool" too. By the end of the summer, they did not want to spend anytime at the baby pool. They preferred to be in the shallow end of the regular pool. Jay could walk on his own in the 2ft end. He also liked to jump in from the wall. Holding Mommy's thumbs he would say, "One, two, FEE!" and jump off the wall. Very cute. He can climb up and down the stairs and even mastered the ladder in the deeper end. He tries so very hard to keep up with Andrew.

Some photos from our last hurrah at the pool:

A Few of Our Favorite Things

Well Summer seems to be drawing to a close. I think this will be my favorite thing from this summer:

Andrew learning to jump into the pool all by himself.









And if I had to guess what Andrew & Jay's favorite things might be, I'd guess...

Eating snacks at the pool for Jay:



And for Andrew, I'd say it would be being allowed to eat a freezepop for breakfast! (Since we made them with V8 juice I figured it was ok.)

Peaches

This summer I've made a couple new peach recipes. I just love peaches in the summertime. But, does anyone else have the song "Peaches" by "The Presidents of the United States of America" running in your heads whenever you are working with peaches in the kitchen?

Here's what I made:

peach cobbler (can't believe I never made peach cobbler before)


peach salsa (yum!)


peach pie (I have made this before...still yum!)

Summer!

We have been enjoying a very busy and very hot summer here in Virginia. We've kept our social calendar full of children's performances at the library and at Wolf Trap's Theatre-in-the-Woods, afternoons at the pool, picking up our CSA on Saturday mornings at the Alexandria Farmer's Market, vacations to Ocean City and Richmond, and 2 baseball games.

Andrew & Mommy picking daisies in our front garden:


Fresh strawberries from our CSA:


One of a few batches of pickles Andrew and Mommy made with cukes from our CSA:


Reading Phillies game with MomMom and PopPop:










Ocean City vacation:




Theater in the Woods:


"picnic" aka "snack time"


Potomac Nationals game:




Our neighborhood pool: